Indian vocab lesson

irony (verb)
Origin: Govt offices and high-level corporate positions
Pronounced: aaye-ronee
Definition: When one manages to screw oneself over badly enough to shed tears, particularly when expectations of others from the said person have risen neck-craning-sky-high

exclude (noun)
Origin: English globally
Pronounced: ex-clued
Definition: A former partner who has developed stalker tendencies and is clued in to what (and who) one is doing these days

cushion (verb)
Origin: English in overpopulated Asian regions
Pronouced: queue-shun
Definition: Shoving and pushing in absolute ignorance of the possibility that one has to queue up or form a semblance of a line, in order to get on the bus/ book a ticket/ climb the Mumbai local train/ pick up booze from the wine shop (ttheka) 10 mins before its official closing time and other such situations of urgency

lollypop (noun)
Origin: Law courts in metros & tier-I cities
Pronounced: law-leap-up
Definition: A situation wherein a jurisdiction/rule is imposed with no leniency whatsoever (particularly to a celebrity or a pg 3 personality) in order to "set an example" to the public, i.e. to ensure that the public authorities become the cynosure of every print & AV news piece on the impartiality of law-and-order in India

revolution (noun)
Origin: Chaotic Delhi roads
Pronounced: Rev-all-you-shun
Definition: The rare occurence when, as the traffic signal turns green (preferably after a 180 second red light), one's car stalls and refuses to start again, while the 1-km-long line of vehicles behind you begin their bitter-not-so-sweet honking symphony (peppered with a dash of rustic swearing)

Socrates (noun)
Origin: Farmhouse parties on the outskirts of NCR
Pronounced: Sau-crate-ease
Definition: A member of the pre-celebration crew (usually accompanied by an equal size of rippling proud muscles and negative IQ) who is responsible for procuring beer crates (preferably 100... or as many as can be piled in his loud, flashy SUV)

Joystick (noun)
Origin: C-grade Hindi almost-porn movies
Pronounced: As written
Definition: Do I need to elaborate here ??? :P (hint: "common baybeee, gimme your joy-ishtick" :))))