A popular childhood tale comes to mind...once upon a time, two otters caught a fish from the river together. They divided it, unfortunately, in seemingly uneven "halves". An argument broke out on who deserves the bigger part of the fish. A monkey, seated on the tree, watched the argument with avid interest planning out his noon fiesta. He intervened as an impartial party who would best be able to divide the fish equally amongst the fighting otters. Taking a giant bite from the bigger part, he made it smaller than the other part, and consequently chewed off a huge chunk of the second part as well. While the otters waited for the clever monkey to even out their fish, he alternatively "attempted to equalize" both parts and in doing so hogged the fish on his own. The otters stood there watching helplessly, while the monkey filled up his belly on account of their feuding nature.
Analogy- the seemingly endless political turmoil in Pakistan.
Politics amongst the civil parties in Pakistan is akin to the Ludhiana family hosiery business. At the turn of the 90s, two major political leaders emerged with their families to try their hand at leading the nation- Benazir Bhutto (ever since the failure of her ex-PM-husband Asif Ali Zardari) and Nawaz Sharif. The two otters. Each ruled as PM for a few inconsequential years while the opposition tried their hardest (in ways moral as well as immoral) to pull down the ruling party. Now, this holds true for any civilian government of the world- it's pretty much the agenda of the opposition party to find flaws, ensure accountability and even throw chappals and rotten fruits to bring the attention of the ruling government on issues, problems and concerns (real or imaginary).
However, in Pakistan, the dynamics are vastly different. The military is known for its paternal calling to keep the country "under control". It is known for its "timely interventions" to seize power from warring civilian parties and rule with an iron fist...Gen'ls Musharraf, Zia-ul-Haq, Yahya Khan, Ayub Khan...
Each time, the army has taken advantage of the precariously positioned political parties and munched on a little bit more of the fish, lying right under the raging noses of the Pakistan Muslim's League and the Pakistan Peoples Party. Now Gen'l Ashfaq Kiyani doesn't mind claiming his rightful place as the "saviour" of the tottering nation, despite the bitter after-taste in the collective military mouths post-Musharraf's catastrophic exit.
Well, in this little twisted tale, the otters started to seem just a dash smarter. They joined forces to bring down the army rule in the past. The Nawaz-Bhutto coalition took place to form one unified civilian party... and then it broke, leaving the military to pick up where it left off again, chewing hungrily at the fish...the very soul of the nation... little by little...
Oddly, the popular Oasis song of the very same title is apt here...
The only way stability will come to the fore in these troubled times in Pakistan will be if the people forget their fanatic issues and regionalism to wake up and scream out the lyrics at all the ravenous creatures involved...
"Cos little by little
We gave you everything
You ever dreamed of
Little by little
The wheels of your life
Have slowly fallen off
Little by little
You have to give it all in all your life
And all the time
I just ask myself why
You're really here"
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
holi crap!
No... I harbour no ill-will towards this festival... in fact, I really enjoy all the madness that is acceptable at Holi... 'crap' just connotes what goes on in my head after a generous dosage of alcohol/bhaang/excessive beer flowing down from my multi-coloured hair while playing Holi!
Holi is the day for colors and water and lots of sunshine and the oldest clothes that you NEVER built up the courage to throw away just yet and tons of gunk (mud-slush-eggs-beer-some unidentifiable black stuff) and a whole lotta intoxicants to ensure you lose all inhibitions and let your ugly side rule... just FYI, the prettier you look at Holi, the less fun you are assumed to be having... the level of cleanliness that shines through when you walk down is directly proportional to how many people attack you at once with whatever liquid-powder-colour-thing that they can get hold of... it's a lot like a reverse-makeover... I like to leave home looking icky enough so people usually lose interest since there isn't much scope for further "improvements"...
The best things about Holi:
~ Noone judges you by how you look or what you are wearing... most people can't even recognize who you are beneath the color-water-sand-mud-paint-ketchup-eggyolk-stuff... the only judgments that are made are how heavy you are so they can determine the number of keen volunteers that will be required to pick you up and throw you into the custom-made slush on the side of the road!
~Alcohol is aplenty... everywhere you go and it's always got an inconspicuous lil pink powder floating about at the top... adds a dash of colour to the beer, you know! Bhaang is passed around to the unsuspecting amateurs and the guys-who've-had-it-every-year-since-they-were-twelve! Everyone's a little buzzed from the cocktail of gunk, the intoxicants, the rushes of adrenaline and the overexposure to the sun... it's a happy-happy day for all involved
~The food is always fantastic, there is always the super-yummy puris and chana, gujiya and sweets and other such heavy-oily stuff that you can shove down your throat while chasing people with buckets of water!
~There will never be a better excuse to throw off that horribly shapeless ridiculously childish tee that the Lakshmi aunties of the world gift you when they come visiting after a whole decade!
~It's a day off from work!!!! ... you get to nap in the afternoon...after all the frantic morning madness and the heavy festive lunch
~ Strangely enough, after the all the showering and scrubbing off and shampooing and soaping and 'loofah'ing your hair shines better from the egg-and-beer conditioner and your skin glows from all that exfoliating
~The streaks of color that remain at random parts of you (for me it's my scalp) for another week, reminding you of the crazy time you had
~Everything is forgiven in Holi, starting from the horrible fashion sense to the bitterness shared between people... everything's good and bright and colorful... and perhaps even a little off-centre and disorienting depending on what you've been consuming!
Holi is the day for colors and water and lots of sunshine and the oldest clothes that you NEVER built up the courage to throw away just yet and tons of gunk (mud-slush-eggs-beer-some unidentifiable black stuff) and a whole lotta intoxicants to ensure you lose all inhibitions and let your ugly side rule... just FYI, the prettier you look at Holi, the less fun you are assumed to be having... the level of cleanliness that shines through when you walk down is directly proportional to how many people attack you at once with whatever liquid-powder-colour-thing that they can get hold of... it's a lot like a reverse-makeover... I like to leave home looking icky enough so people usually lose interest since there isn't much scope for further "improvements"...
The best things about Holi:
~ Noone judges you by how you look or what you are wearing... most people can't even recognize who you are beneath the color-water-sand-mud-paint-ketchup-eggyolk-stuff... the only judgments that are made are how heavy you are so they can determine the number of keen volunteers that will be required to pick you up and throw you into the custom-made slush on the side of the road!
~Alcohol is aplenty... everywhere you go and it's always got an inconspicuous lil pink powder floating about at the top... adds a dash of colour to the beer, you know! Bhaang is passed around to the unsuspecting amateurs and the guys-who've-had-it-every-year-since-they-were-twelve! Everyone's a little buzzed from the cocktail of gunk, the intoxicants, the rushes of adrenaline and the overexposure to the sun... it's a happy-happy day for all involved
~The food is always fantastic, there is always the super-yummy puris and chana, gujiya and sweets and other such heavy-oily stuff that you can shove down your throat while chasing people with buckets of water!
~There will never be a better excuse to throw off that horribly shapeless ridiculously childish tee that the Lakshmi aunties of the world gift you when they come visiting after a whole decade!
~It's a day off from work!!!! ... you get to nap in the afternoon...after all the frantic morning madness and the heavy festive lunch
~ Strangely enough, after the all the showering and scrubbing off and shampooing and soaping and 'loofah'ing your hair shines better from the egg-and-beer conditioner and your skin glows from all that exfoliating
~The streaks of color that remain at random parts of you (for me it's my scalp) for another week, reminding you of the crazy time you had
~Everything is forgiven in Holi, starting from the horrible fashion sense to the bitterness shared between people... everything's good and bright and colorful... and perhaps even a little off-centre and disorienting depending on what you've been consuming!
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